In a sharing mood.
I’ve only met my biological father 3x’s in my entire life, and two of those times were for less than five minutes.
I think the last time was when I was 18 years old.
I’m his only child, and he’s started to try to reach out to me occasionally just over the last year or so.
We’ve talked on the phone a few times, and there’s some good intention and effort there, but it always felt a little awkward. No surprise there.
I’ve always really looked up to and idolized my grampa, who I lost last summer.
I used to call him every year on Father’s Day.
It was tough for me today, because I couldn’t do that this time.
Tonight, I went ahead and called my bio dad to wish him a happy Father’s Day. I felt the need to do it for some reason.
I left a brief and awkward voice-mail. In some ways, that was a relief, but I did it.
After I hung up, I realized that this was probably the first time that anyone has ever said that to him, much less from me.
I don’t know why I’m sharing this with the public.
I’m actually a really private guy, maybe even to a fault sometimes.
I guess maybe it’s because I’m sure there are many others out there with similarly less than perfect situations and stories, and there’s something kind of powerful here (at least to me) that’s difficult to put my finger on exactly that I needed to get out.
I suppose as long as you’re alive, it’s never too late.
Anyway, there it is.